Monday, January 08, 2007

My Return

Well, it's been some time since I was here last. The purpose of this blog was previously as a reflective log for my Counselling Skills course. That's now done and dusted: exams completed amidst my brother's tribunal - resulting in a pass and unfair dismissal. Followed by holidays in the Forest of Dean, the Lake District and Cornwall. Christmas has rushed by and now I'm on the cusp of beginning my new course in Birmingham at the UCE - National Academy of Writing - oooooh.

Am I nervous? I'd say. I've just spent the last two months writing and rewriting the same 2,500 word opening to my new novel in an attempt to get the style, substance and purpose right and ready to submit as my piece for crit when I start the course. (Up until the end of 2006 that 2,500 was a mind numbing 1,000 words).

Argh, self doubt, crippling poor vocabulary. I entered the Winter Kills competition and didn't win. Again I can appreciate why I didn't win, but it's still gauling - in the same kind of way that something out of your hands usually is. It's no one elses fault that I haven't won (or even come third), though the judge could have picked me (lol). It is my fault as far as I'm not that good - yet - and even then I can't afford blame to myself because if I'm just not up to scratch then I'm just not up to scratch. Must press on regardless. Learn and keep moving.

Anyhoo, I've got 500 words left to write on this opening before I submit it. Also, the new competition is up and I've got to start thinking about that - jeesh, I make it all sound like such a chore!

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